How To Eliminate The Complexes That Make Us Suffer

To eliminate the complexes that prevent us from moving forward, it is necessary to take a series of steps and above all, be willing to get down to work, as well as follow the guidance of a professional if necessary. To help you, here are some tips to help you think about it and get moving.

First of all, keep in mind that, believe it or not, you have the right to enjoy a full life. That right is yours, no one else has to grant it to you after a special event or anything like that.

To enjoy a full life, you must understand that you are your lights and your shadows always. Accepting only one and denying the other will not bring you to fruition and will only make things more difficult for you. Instead, accepting yourself as you are, day by day, and working to improve what you like so much, will help you live better and act consistently at all times. That can give you a lot of peace.

What are complexes?

According to the Dictionary of the Spanish language, a complex is defined as ‘a set of ideas, emotions or tendencies repressed or associated with those experiences that disturb behavior’.

In other words, the complexes would be those feelings that are related to those aspects that we do not like about ourselves and that, therefore, do not allow us to achieve happiness. Within the complexes we can differentiate three groups: physical, mental and social.

1. Physical complexes

Physical complexes tend to affect more those people who give great importance to appearances and aesthetics, in general. Therefore, when they find something that they do not like or please, when looking in the mirror they can have a distorted perception of reality. 

In some cases the physical complexes can become psychological disorders. For example, bulimia or anorexia.

2. Psychic complexes

Psychic complexes are related to mental abilities. Basically it is that the person feels inferior to the rest for not having the same (or more merits) than others.

3. Social complexes

They have to do with culture, economy, profession, origins, job opportunities, type of society, customs, social status, and so on.

The first step in eliminating complexes is to understand that it is a problem that can be traced back to childhood. Generally,  due to pressure or sanctions inflicted by parents, with the aim of making their children perfect.

It is normal to have complexes. We all have them. The problem lies in how much they affect us in everyday life and in our interpersonal relationships. Some choose to eliminate the problem and others to hide it. The best solution for this is to accept the flaws and emphasize the virtues. Of course, that takes time, effort and, most of all, flexibility.

Physical complexes and insecurity

Millions of people live in the world of complexes who cannot get out of their own labyrinths. Although it may be difficult, there is always a way out to put aside beauty stereotypes and prejudices related to social strata or educational levels.

To eliminate complexes, first of all we must ask ourselves why do we feel bad about being different? What would be the definition of “different” or “normal”? The answer to this is not in the magazines, on the catwalks or in the cinema but in “real life” with women of flesh and blood and cellulite, among others.

The physical aspect is something very relative. What was considered beautiful in the 15th century is not the same as what we believe to be beautiful today. It even depends on the culture since in some cases thinness is synonymous with ugliness or disease.

Complexes end when we have high enough self-esteem to trust ourselves and make our abilities and virtues shine for ourselves. Self-security is vital to avoid being a self-conscious person.

Also, who determines when a nose is large or a bust is small? Who has the power to tell us that our height is short or our hips are fat?

Beyond the fact that a doctor can tell us that the body mass index is high for our height and can cause disease, no one else could have the authority to speak about it.

The list of physical defects is innumerable because each person can have a different one (or more than one). The good news is that these are the easiest to identify because the person either talks about them or tries to hide them.

Tips for removing complexes

The consequences of having complexes can interfere with our day to day in a disastrous way. To address them, we recommend the following.

1. Observe others

It is not about looking at other people’s flaws to criticize them but rather observing how they deal with their own weaknesses. This will help you to work on your own gray areas and better your tolerance capacity.

2. Talk about your complexes

It is not about looking for ears so that you only complain but to help you and improve. By talking about what distresses you, you can find a solution faster. On the contrary, locking yourself in your suffering does not allow you to eliminate complexes but to deepen them.

3. Pay attention to compliments

It is often difficult to receive a compliment or compliment. Surely one of your loved ones has ever told you that you look good, have beautiful eyes or the ability to solve a problem.

Pay attention to them! Because they are absolutely right. Learn to love yourself, to accept compliments and also learn to give them, as this will make you feel great.

Final reflection

Working in your own complexes is a process that takes time and does not have to become an extra pressure within the routine. For this reason, you have to maintain a flexible attitude, and understand that just as progress can soon be noticed, it will be normal to have some “relapses”. The important thing is to take note of what happens then and keep trying so as not to get stuck.

In case of having difficulties working on what we do not like so much about ourselves, we can always turn to a professional.