7 Mistakes 21st Century Parents Make

Parents always try to educate their children and do their best. However, sometimes, despite doing it with the best intention, actions or omissions occur that are part of some of the mistakes that parents make to a greater or lesser extent.

Parents are always concerned about the welfare of their children and wonder if they are doing well or not. This time we want to guide you in this regard.

Most parents apply what worked to our own parenting, and others turn to other parents for help and advice. However, these efforts seem not to be enough.

We always want our children to be able to develop their full potential. This is nothing new, because we want the best for them, but we don’t always end up achieving it. Very often we end up doing the opposite.

The job of educating is not easy. Therefore, in the following lines we will help you understand this wonderful experience a little more.

Mistakes 21st Century Parents Make

Many parents want their children to make decisions for themselves and at the same time hope that those decisions will conform to what they want. Many times,  the  mistakes that parents make lower the  self-esteem of the little ones and affect their relationship with them.

Therefore, if you do not want to make the mistakes that 21st century parents often make, the first thing you should do is identify them.

1. Try to live through your children

This is one of the most common mistakes parents make. It is not correct to pretend that your children study what you could not or to visualize them as your second chance.

You must support them to find their own path, as this study published in Teaching and Research in Psychology points out . Help them develop their own interests and passions. Allow them to explore various areas until they define what they really like. In this way, they will be able to discover themselves.

2. Overprotecting them, one of the mistakes parents make in the 21st century

It is good to worry about the children, to ensure their safety and well-being; But being  overprotective can make them dependent and insecure adults. And this is evidenced by this work carried out by professionals from the Technical University of Cotopaxi, Ecuador. You must provide the tools that allow them to orient themselves and make good decisions.

Many times, we overlook that our children must learn for themselves. Therefore, let them make mistakes, fall and get up. Each one must live their own process.  If you don’t allow your children to do things their way, despite your guidance, it will be difficult for them to mature and face life.

3. Do tasks that correspond to them

Another mistake parents make has to do with taking responsibility away from them. Allow your children to take on challenges and obligations and to comply with these in the established times. You can be a little flexible at this point, but never do what they have committed to for them.

It is important that if they are wrong you do not reprimand them harshly. You learn a lot from mistakes. Making mistakes and taking responsibility will teach them to handle frustrations and become independent.

4. Put the role of friend before that of father

Camaraderie with your children must be present in your relationship with them. However,  being friends with your children can cause excessive permissiveness, because you want their approval. Instead, under the role of father, you must accept that many times your children will get angry.

They won’t always agree to the rules and decisions you make and, in most cases, they won’t even understand them. But they, as they reach adulthood, are sure to thank you.

5. Indiscriminate use of bribery, another of the mistakes parents make

Bribery is one of the most common mistakes parents make today. “If you behave well, I will give you the chocolate that you like; If you do your homework, I’ll buy you the video game you want ”. Is it familiar to you?

It is likely that sometimes it will work for you, but it is not an adequate strategy to educate them. It is an unhealthy way of controlling what you have not achieved by other means.

6. Not spending quality time with children

The stress of the daily routine can destroy family relationships with overwhelming speed. You must make a space to dedicate your presence to your children. Many times parents make the mistake of not spending time with them, or asking them how they have done in this or that activity.

More regrettable is when they try an approach to tell us something that worries them and we hardly pay attention to them. This error generates emotional distancing and little trust towards parents.

7. Confrontation of criteria in parenting

Certainly, the father and mother do not have to think exactly alike. However, having different or contrary education criteria affects the formation of children.  If one parent implements a punishment and the other lifts it, the child will be disoriented. In this way, the children have the hard task of deciding which of the two to obey.

Consequently, they end up losing respect for both of them. For this reason,  team parenting must be implemented  to forge family ties that last over time.

Ultimately, pretending to be great parents can be a very heavy and frustrating burden. What children really need is that their parents love them, guide them and support them in the fulfillment of their dreams.

Likewise, it is vitally important that parents encourage their children at different stages of their growth. Only then can they become responsible and happy adults.